


The Christmas Kiss

by GoodDoctorStorage (orphan_account)



Category: The Good Doctor (TV 2017)
Genre: Autism, Autism Spectrum, Canon Autistic Character, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, F/M, First Kiss, Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-17
Updated: 2018-12-17
Packaged: 2019-09-21 00:32:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17032878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/GoodDoctorStorage
Summary: Lea set the boundaries. They would remain friends. Only friends.Yet the only thing she wishes for this holiday is a kiss from the sweet surgeon boy next door.(A Shaun + Lea fiction where they get back together and can no longer ignore their feelings for each other)





	The Christmas Kiss

**Author's Note:**

> or. I wanted to contribute to the community by giving others something to read, as I've enjoyed reading all the available fanfiction for the show. Merry Christmas <3

" _Feelings can change."_

Lea pondered the meaning of the words often enough that she began to believe them. They'd echo around in her mind as she considered their hidden meanings. Her feelings were changing. They were growing into something more, evolving into something so magical that she often found herself second-guessing the world around her.

When he'd rebutted with those three little beautiful words, how had he known that they'd become true? How had he been so sure of their future together all this time? That despite all their arguments, their feelings would become entwined like vines climbing together towards the sky. She could no longer deny that an irresistible bond had developed between the two.

She found the words reaching out to her at the quietest of times.  And with Shaun Murphy's quiet way of life, it gave Lea a lot of time to reflect. (Lea generally contributed the most in their conversations. Shaun preferred to just listen.)

The first time she'd noticed this strange phenomenon was their return trip to the pet store. Shaun had defended her honor against the grumpy employee, insisting the fish's illness wasn't her fault. She hadn't killed Hubert. She'd been flooded with respect and admiration as he stood his ground in her defense. He'd proven that she deserved happiness.

That was the first time she'd felt _it_. Something small growing within her that pulled her closer towards him. A spark that she couldn't ignore. It was the first time since returning to San Jose that she could see something developing between the two.

The next time that the words filled her mind, they were both at home. Shaun had insisted that the few dishes in the sink could be quickly washed by hand - there was no point wasting the outrageous amount of water that the dishwasher would use.

Shaun was washing the dishes and handing them over to Lea to dry when the tips of their fingers brushed together by mistake. The contact was quick and simple, but it sent sparks flying through her hand. The sensation sent her whirling in the thoughts her feelings created. She craved to hold him close and feel his warmth, but Shaun quickly pulled his hand away.

At first, Lea worried the contact had upset him. They weren't officially dating. Despite the chemistry they shared, neither of them had the courage to say something more. But when she snuck a glance over her shoulder, she found him blushing with a smile stretched on his face. He'd felt it too.

" _Feelings can change."_

Shaun's feelings had never changed. He'd never stopped wanting her.

She'd been the one to stop their relationship before it even had the chance to bloom. The thorns from his shouting had left little barbs that dug deep and pained her whenever he was close. Little drops of poison that screamed at her, reminding her how easily she could hurt him. How easy she could break him.

She could never break Shaun Murphy again.

Shaun's voice pulled her away from her thoughts. She had to look around to remember what was going on. The two had been sitting side by side in their shared living space. She sat on a small futon as a Christmas movie played in the background, Shaun sitting neatly on the other side of the couch.

Lea had seen the movie so many times before that it barely held her focus. Instead, she'd spent the entire movie inside her own headspace, wondering what Shaun would think of her growing fondness towards him. Would he approve of her taking the next step? Would he become upset with her indecision?

"Huh?" she asked instead. She'd missed his words completely.

"I don't understand. How did singing make the sleigh fly?"

Lea laughed. It was so like him to ask a question like that. Only Shaun Murphy would question the magical lore a Christmas movie, the simplistic excuse of Christmas magic and its effect on the world.

"When she started singing a Christmas song, she broke through her stage fright and it inspired the world around her to sing along, a sudden blast of Christmas energy filling their hearts. It was that rush of Christmas spirit around that powered Santa's sleigh," she explained to him.

Shaun shrugged. The story still didn't make much sense to him, but he didn't feel the need to push the matter any further. He was content to just sit alongside Lea as the credits rolled.

Lea's heart continued to beat rapidly as the words scrolled by. She'd worked herself up once again.

The entire movie had been an internal battle that was brewing inside her. She'd spent the majority of the movie side-eyeing his hand. With them sitting so close together, Lea had been tempted to reach over and tangle her fingers into his, but she felt unsure of herself. She continued to find herself over analyzing the situation.

After she caused such a big scene, would Shaun accept her as something else? Could they become more than friends? Or would he be upset with her for always changing her mind?

The silence was painful. She could hear her own heart pound away in her chest. The pounding was so loud that she could swear Shaun must be able to hear it. It felt it would bust through her chest at any moment.

She tried once more to make a move on him, inching her fingers closer towards his hand. They were so close now that they were practically touching. So close that she could almost feel his body heat. All she needed was the tiniest bit of extra courage to make her feelings heard.

But her lips felt dry and when she opened her mouth to speak, nothing came out. Her fingers felt frozen with fear. She was powerless.

And before she knew it, it was too late. She had been too slow.

Unaware of the battle going on beside him, Shaun had pulled his hand away and stood up to get ready for bed. He flicked a button on the remote to turn off the movie and the room became dark around them. She could no longer see his face.

"Thank you, Lea. I enjoyed watching the movie with you," he sang.

She forced a smile on her face as she did her best to hide her nerves. She pulled her arm back across the couch, doing her best to appear as casual as possible. She'd been spread across the couch the entire movie and was only just realizing how much she'd hogged the couch.

"Me too Shaun," she replied.

She had seen little of the movie, but she always enjoyed spending time with Shaun.

* * *

The next six days were nothing but panic and fear.

Lea no longer had the time to worry about her feelings for Shaun or their upcoming relationship status change. Her heart didn't have the time to worry about intertwining their fingers or kissing his lips.

Something much more urgent had developed between the two. Something so painful that her stomach twisted in worry and tugged in distress. Her stress levels churned so high she had to fight back vomiting constantly.

Shaun was stuck in a deadly quarantine.

The news hadn't seemed like a big deal at first - his biggest focus had been the buzzing light that refused to cooperate with him. He'd called her and asked her to help his mentor out. He's assured her that he'd be home soon, so she'd brushed it off like no big deal and took Dr. Glassman to his appointment in Shaun's absence.

On day two of the outbreak, the local news station had gotten hold of the story. Seeing the yellow tape around the hospital put a new perspective on the situation. Shaun was being brave, but Lea had a pit in her stomach she couldn't ignore. He was in real danger.

As time passed, the news seemed to only become grimmer. Shaun had reported three deaths from the virus. He'd had a horrible panic attack from the buzzing light that he was beyond embarrassed about. One of the doctors was in bed with the deathly virus. Everything sounded dangerously somber.

And on the third day, she lost all contact with Shaun. His phone was going straight to voicemail without even ringing. His phone battery had likely died - one could only preserve the battery so long. But it still sent her mind spinning with the worst possible scenario.

Despite all this news, she still tried to call him every few hours for the full six days he was stuck between the hospital walls. She needed to hear his voice, to know he was safe. She had to believe he would come home to her.

Her nerves were getting the better of her.

It was worst during the night. The apartment was unusually empty and the silence allowed her head to spiral. Instead of sleeping, she'd lay in her bed thinking of him. His eyes. His lips. His fingers. Anything she could find to distract herself from his danger. She would grip the empty sheets beside her and yearn for his presence. She'd do anything to have him here with her safe and sound.

She promised herself if he came home, she wouldn't hesitate anymore. She would be brave.

She would kiss him.

She would hold him close once again.

* * *

Loud knocking startled Lea awake as someone pounded on the door.

Still groggy and pulled down by sleep, she took few seconds for her eyes to adjust to the surrounding darkness, blinking a few times to force herself awake.

She groaned as she took in the world around her. Her day at work had been especially long and stressful. She was behind on her paperwork and her boss refused to give her a break. Only the release of Christmas Eve had freed her.

Additionally, the weight of the hospital's quarantine had kept her awake into the late hours of the night the last week. It weighed on her mind, constantly pulling her mind into a constant state of fear. Sleep had been rare. She mostly just spent her time sitting in front of the fireplace with a drink in her hand to numb her.

The knocking continued. Lea huffed as she searched for her cell phone in the mangled covers. It was difficult to find in all the blanket folds when she was still half asleep. She was a messy sleeper and usually fell asleep with her phone in the bed.

Once it was in her hand, she checked the screen. It was three in the morning. There were no messages from Shaun.

Temptation rushed through her to ignore the knocking, to close her eyes and let sleep consume her once again. Whatever was going on couldn't be that important. She was too exhausted to deal with it. It could wait until the morning.

But the knocking continued, only becoming more frantic as time went on. Every time she found herself slipping back into sleep, the slamming of the door would jostle her back into consciousness.

Lea grumbled under her breath. It didn't seem like it would stop any time soon, so she had no choice but to get up and answer the door. She rolled herself out from under the covers and fumbled around the dark room, doing her best to quickly throw on a bathrobe. At least she'd remembered to put on pajamas that night, but she still didn't feel presentable enough.

"All right! All right! Just a second!" she shouted angrily.

She flicked on her lamp and took a quick look in the mirror. Her hair was messy from rubbing on her pillow and makeup smeared from a long day's work. Whoever was knocking better have something important to say. The building better be burning to the damn ground.

But when she opened her bedroom door, she was bombarded with warmth before she had a chance to take in what was happening. Had the knocking been on her bedroom door all along? She hadn't realized how close the knocking had been.

His scent filled her nose as he wrapped his arms around her and held her close. He was holding her tightly, almost as if he'd shared the same fear they'd never be this close again. That he'd never see her again.

" _I used to hate hugs, but now, sometimes I don't."_

Shaun was home. He was safe. He wasn't sick. Everything would be okay.

"Your home," she whispered into his scrubs. He bore the same pair she'd seen him leave with six days ago. They were dirty and stunk from all the work he'd done, but she didn't care. She was overjoyed that they reeked of his natural odor. She'd smelled nothing so comforting in her life before.

As she leaned deep into his chest and gripped at his clothes, she could feel all the concern she'd felt the last four days begin to melt away. She finally felt whole again. Tears welled up in her eyes as she imagined what could have happened to him. How close she had been to losing her best friend.

Neither spoke could find the words to speak. They didn't need to. Instead, their hearts beat together as one as they stood in the door frame of her room, the darkness looming around them.

She found herself unable to pull away. To do so would admit the moment was over, to finish the embrace would return them to the world where they were friends and only friends. She wasn't ready to face that reality. She needed him too much.

Sooner than she could have ever wished, she felt his arms loosening around her. With a deep breath of relief, he released her from his grip and took a step backward. His hands hung at his side as he spoke.

"I'm… I'm sorry," Shaun said to her. It was barely a whisper, but it managed to hurt just the same.

She scanned Shaun's face, but could only read the guilt in his pained expression. His eyes darted around. He was unable to look her in the eye as he apologized, even more so than usual.

At first, she didn't understand what he was apologizing for. Her heart seemed to shatter as her mind rushed for an explanation. She had been burdened with worry for him, but that wasn't his fault. Was he sorry for waking her? For squeezing her too tightly? All of these things were more than acceptable to her.

And then, as he took another step away from her and fidgeted his hand towards his pocket, the meaning of the apology became suddenly clear.

He was apologizing for overstepping the boundaries she'd put into place. The boundaries she'd set for him when they moved in together. She'd told him they needed to remain friends. She'd insisted feelings don't change.

And now he was apologizing for feeling so much more.

If only he knew he wasn't alone. That she had soared sky high when she learned he was safe. That she felt at home in his arms.

"You don't need to apologize Shaun. I can't imagine how stressful the quarantine was for you," she said in the gentlest voice she could muster. Her heart pounded in her chest as she spoke the words and she had to work to hold back her tears.

The room was still dark, but she watched him shuffle forward and grip at his arm as he stimmed. She watched him thoughtfully. In his exhausted state, it was very difficult to read his expression. It was impossible for her to read his thoughts - even more so than usual.

"So many people became sick from the virus. I couldn't help them. We lost so many people," he said, his body trembling over the words. He could barely choke out the last sentence.

Lea swallowed down fear. She was hesitant to ask him about it any further. She'd seen the pictures on the television, but she'd tried not to focus on the intensity of the virus. She'd heard the death count. She already knew how bad it had been.

"You were going to pick me up. We were going to drive to Dr. Glassman's appointment together," he reminded her.

"I was running late," she replied. She'd felt horribly guilty for being late. Shaun hated it when she ran late. And this time she'd been an hour late.

"I know," he whispered to her. "If you had been on time, you would have been locked in quarantine with me. You could have been one of the lost."

She was unsure how to reply. She had been so concerned for Shaun's safety, the thought hadn't crossed her mind she could have been infected. It had never occurred that she was in danger.

"I could have lost you forever," he breathed. Tears streamed down his face as he spoke. He stimmed his hands together in concern for her.

Lea couldn't stand it a moment longer. With his confession, she had no reason to hold herself back. The universe was pulling them close, begging for them to be together. She could feel her their beating hearts call to each other.

She moved towards him, letting the distance between them shrink until their chests touched. She raised her hands between them and gently placed them on his sides. She could feel herself rushing through time to a place where things were once easier.

"Kiss me, Shaun," she begged.

Shaun didn't hesitate.

He was careful and gentle as he kissed her.

Lea could sense his inexperience as their lips moved together, but it didn't bother her. He was still learning how to kiss and Lea would take every chance to teach him if it meant they could continue like this forever.

She could feel the passion rushing through her veins. It was quick and rocketing. It built up deep within her as she felt the warmth of their bodies intertwine.

Shaun's passion felt completely different. It was a slow burn that ignited in his heart and spread throughout his body. He could feel a small heat rising within him. He pulled back, a bit of embarrassment spreading through him. Blush danced on his cheeks.

Lea tucked some stray hair behind her ear as she laughed nervously. The idea of his excitement sent her mind spinning. "Don't worry about it," she whispered back.

He didn't reply with words, but his hands stimmed at his sides before a yawn worked its way through his mouth.

She rolled her eyes, though she was just too happy to be upset with him. "Shaun Murphy, am I boring you?" she asked him.

His fingers flicked together as he replied. "I'm just… Tired."

Pity filled her eyes. It had been a draining week for Shaun. She could see the exhaustion in every part of his being, but mostly in the fight for him to keep his eyes open. She felt wide awake in comparison.

"Why don't you go to bed? We can open gifts tomorrow. We can spend Christmas together once you're rested," she suggested. After a quick rest, they would both be much more sensible.

"I'm scared to leave you alone. What if something happens?" he asked. She could sense the anxiety in his voice, the fear he'd wake up and everything would be back to normal. That he would wake up to find this all a dream.

"It won't," she told him in her most reassuring voice. She was sure. If this was a dream, she never wanted to wake up.

"What if it is?" he whispered.

Time ticked by as the two stood in the empty doorway. He had been through so much these last few days, so much anxiety and guilt over what could have been. He couldn't bear the thought of ever losing her again.

Lea turned behind her towards her empty bed. She knew returning to it would leave her with the empty yearning desire, the void that could never be filled. But maybe it didn't have to be cold and empty? Maybe it could be something more.

There was plenty of room for both of them.

"Shaun, would you like to sleep next to me tonight?"

He was too tired to think. He held his arm close as he stared at the ground nervously, but there was the smallest nod from him. Even if it was only for tonight, he wanted to keep her close. He wanted to be with her.

Lea stepped to the side as an invitation to her room. She would keep him close tonight.

Once Shaun was neatly tucked into the bed with his own comforter, she turned off all the lights so she could join him. He'd fallen asleep instantly, almost the second he'd hit the pillow. He seemed so peaceful. She couldn't help but reflect on his beauty.

She pulled off her bathrobe carefully and hung it up. With Shaun safe, Lea was able to calmly curl into her own ball beside him. She exhaled a sigh of relief. Everything would be okay. There will still problems they would have to deal with, but for now, Shaun was home safe and they were happy together.

Their bodies didn't touch, but she could feel his body heat seep through the blankets. Only her hand rested outside of the blankets. A desperate effort to be close to him.

As her heart slowed its rhythm, she could feel the call of sleep pulling her under once more.

The last thing she felt was Shaun entwining his fingers into hers.

He was home. He was safe. And he was all hers.

 

_Will you fix me up? Will you show me hope?_

_The end of the day, I'm helpless_

_Can you keep me close?_

_Can you love me most?_

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed. I would love to know what you guys think. <3


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